don’t date someone who doesn’t put the grocery cart back in the cart return
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It’s called creating jobs
actually its called ‘not being rude and making someone’s job easier’
*pours box of cornflakes directly onto the floor of Aisle 7* it’s called creating jobs sweetie ;)
A required read from Michael Oman-Reagan.
This is all true. This all happened in Canada, and its very likely it will happen in the USA under Trump and be worse than Harper’s crackdown on Science ever was.
Links cited in this twitter essay:
The Big Chill: “Scientists Can’t Do the Job They Were Hired to Do”
More than 1000 Jobs Lost, Climate Program Hit Hard in Coming Environment Canada Cuts
Leaked document says Canadian federal climate scientists being blocked from media contact
Harper Government Trashes Another Federal Science Library
Federal scientists closely monitored during polar conference
Science Silenced: US Scientist Caught in Canadian Muzzle
Climate-change scientists feel ‘muzzled’ by Ottawa: Documents
The Canadian War on Science: A long, unexaggerated, devastating chronological indictment
i arrive at egypt
staff: snaked
water: bloodied
frogs: out
lice: itching
beasts: wild
cattle: diseased
skin: boiled
hail: flaming
crops: destroyed
sun: hidden
heirs: killed
we are finally escorted out of egypt
The best Passover meme ever all the other memes can go home now
This is the meme content I like to see
let me tell u something chefs love memes about how a kitchen works and this one caused my entire kitchen to riot and my head chef sent it to all the area chefs in the company
my kids: omg you were alive when Britain left the EU?? thats something my textbooks talk about what was it like
me: i was looking at memes about it
BE NICE
HE IS DOING HIS JOB
YOU MADE HIM SAD YOU MONSTER
hell is right-clicking to save an image and accidentally clicking ‘email image’ and having to wait forty years for some email program you didn’t even know existed to rise from its slumber like some lovecraftian ancient god, meanwhile the fans on your laptop are preparing for takeoff and you stare dead-eyed as the rainbow spirals, spirals, spirals. you wait and suffer this cosmic karma. days pass. “just a few more seconds” you slur. your laptop freezes and the concept of time is no longer comprehensible. your family and friends forget your name and you fade from existence.
Bad News: Our boss locked the keys inside the building.
Good News: We didn’t have to wait around for a locksmith.
Bad News: My boss finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my Tragic Backstory™. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls.
Good News: A cute girl saw me do it.
Bad News: It was Maggie, and since she’s already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she’ll never think I’m cool no matter what I do. It’s too late. She knows.
There are million dollar blockbuster movies that were less entertaining than the rollercoaster this post just took me on.